An Expression of Gratitude

There is a quote from German theologian and mystic Meister Eckhart which says, “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” Meister Eckhart lived in the 13^th century. His writings were about how the individual soul united with God. For him, spirituality was relational, and gratitude was an important step to communing with God. 

Gratitude, appreciation, recognition, are expressions of thanks, according to Collins Dictionary. Expressing thanks is a mark of socialization, and contributes to a person’s resilience and success in life. I did not understand this until I was in school. One day, our second-grade teacher took the class to the supermarket. She was going to buy each student a candy bar. We dutifully lined up and took our candy to the cashier so she could scan it.  Then we stood in line to wait for the others. There was one girl in our class who did something different. She said, “Thank you” to the cashier. Our teacher spontaneously kissed her on the head for being so polite. Then everyone else realized that they forgot an important convention and said “Thank you” in unison. It wasn’t until years later that I realized that I had no way of knowing that was the proper thing to do. 

Gratitude must be taught in the home. When parents do not model values, social conventions or prompt their children, those children enter the world unprepared.  Households today are under many stressors. Families are overwhelmed with financial pressures, stretching their resources, and providing for their children. Sometimes job, unemployment, health, transportation issues, or home maintenance override a parent’s involvement in their child’s development. Some parents feel inadequate, judged, or defensive that resources aren’t available to them. Those attitudes can be absorbed by the children if the parents do not consciously value and affirm their kids. This creates dissatisfaction and a sense of lack instead of being thankful for the good things one has. 

Gratitude is also something that must be practiced especially during challenging times. This doesn’t mean ignoring problems or minimizing their seriousness. Saying thank you, showing appreciation, and acknowledging what is good in life help to increase hope and build resilience. In the 1990’s there was a trend of writing a gratitude journal. This trend was made popular by an author named Sarah Ban Breathnach, who wrote a book called “The Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude.” It was a book meant for women to recognize what they already had that was good and to cultivate a more grateful heart. During that time, I bought the book, read it, and began taking the recommendations to heart because I was still finishing my chaplaincy training and the last parts of my ordination process. I wondered if I was ever going to clear the professional and vocational hurdles to become an ordained minister and a chaplain. As I persevered, I learned to reframe challenges into blessings and not take everything personally. When I needed to assert myself, I learned to do it more graciously and diplomatically. And I prayed for God to help me and thanked Him for every positive, beneficial thing that happened, thus implementing my new practice to remind myself that I do indeed have much to be thankful for. This year, I celebrated 28 years of ordained ministry and 15 years of service at the hospital. I am so grateful for the struggle, the lessons, and the longevity. For a person of faith, gratitude to God reminds them that they are ultimately never alone. God, their Higher Power, is there to offer guidance and provide for their needs. 

This Thanksgiving may be a challenging year for many due to the rising costs of goods and services. Other families may have a loved one who is sick or in the hospital. Still, others may be facing tough personal choices about life, career, or relationships. Yet, Thanksgiving Day gives us time to pause and reflect on the blessings that many of us still have in our lives compared to those who are struggling in other parts of the world. This makes gathering with friends or family members a special time for showing appreciation to the people who are closest to us. 

Some of us will be working on Thanksgiving to provide for our families. Others will be serving people who are often forgotten except for holidays (the homeless, the elderly, and the poor). There will be customs and annual traditions to give us opportunities to observe the holiday in our own way. Religious services, parades, football games, and marathon programs will provide solace or distraction for a while. Amid all the festivities, let us remember to take stock of our blessings and give thanks for them with a grateful heart.